My woes with Matatu Drivers

The typical Matatu driver is rude, obnoxious and will always try to hit on you if you so much as look at him sideways! (Matatu is the local term for the 14-carrier public transport minibus). My woes with these guys are a mile long, but recently I met one who took the cake!!

I like to take the front seat because it has the best leg room, and on this occasion the seat between me and the driver was not occupied and since I was going home pretty late, there were just two other passengers in the rest of the Matatu. Now usually, when these guys see that that there are too few passengers, they try to pawn them off to another Matatu that is going the same way, so that they can turn around and go get more passengers. The problem is, the new Matatu driver is even less invested and chances of being abandoned become even greater!

Anyway, true to form, this Matatu driver was trying to pawn us off and in desperation I decided to use my womanly wiles to persuade him to take us up to our agreed destination. So I start off by asking him what his name is (Daniels something or other), and ask him as sweetly as I can to please take us all the way and not leave us stranded in the middle of no where. After some back and forth, with the other passengers chipping in, he grudgingly relents, claiming that if I wasn't so young and beautiful he would not have agreed. I sit back, well satisfied with my efforts. Daniels however, not one to waste opportunity, immediately launches into some spiel about what a big favour he is doing me and how he will have to produce a signed statement to his wife concerning his whereabouts and why he is getting home so late, and how about I make it worth his while and give him my number.

I smile at him in the dark and go: "But you are married - what use will my phone number be?"

"Eh, don't worry - I know how to handle these things..."

"Well how do you know I am not married myself?"

"Oh, if you are married, that is even better! I like married women."

I shake my head: " No, I'm sorry, I never have anything to do with married men"

"Eee?" he complains, "you also reconsider" as he reaches across the seat separating us and pinches (!) my thigh!!

"Hey! Don't do that!" I exclaim..

He smiles to himself and withdraws his hand and drapes his arm across the seat next to me..

"So," he goes on "are you really married? I was thinking that I could take you all the way to your door step if you like"

I squeeze into my seat and move nearer the door, and reply as frostily as I can manage: "Thank you but no thanks - I already asked some one to pick me up from the bus stop" I lie.

"Who? Your husband?"

"Yes, as a matter of fact"

"Eeeh, why disturb him now?? You can even give him my number and ask him to call me - I think I can take him on."

I look over at the man and wonder what the hell he is going on about. "No, that won't be necessary - he doesn't mind picking me up" I continue trying to squeeze up against the door, and when he sees me doing this he reaches across me and says "hey - careful - the door is not locked!"; he locks the door and taps thigh nearest the door as he brings his hand back to the wheel.

"Stop that!" I snarl. He throws his head back and laughs: "Come on, we're just having a bit of harmless fun"

I snatch my bag off the seat between us and lay it across my lap, and proceed to sit there fuming. Honestly. These guys think that a little flirting gives them the license to basically molest you! I wonder if I should just get out of the Matatu but the road looks quite deserted, and I can't be sure that I will get another Matatu at this time of night. The other passengers chatter on, no clue what is going on. I turn around and engage the other passengers in some banal chatter, and ignore Daniels though he keeps trying to interrupt our conversation. He even turns up the music and dedicates some song that's playing (and that I have never heard) to me.

Eventually, we reach our destination. Quick as lightening, before I can open the door Daniels reaches across me to unlock the door and I immediately press into my seat and hope he does not try anything else. Sure enough though, as one hand unlocks the door the other hand snakes towards my crotch (!) and when I push it away roughly he growls in my ear "come on, at least let me just touch your hootchie, you've already refused to give me your number!"

I practically fall out of that Matatu as I shout: "I TOLD YOU TO STOP THAT!!"

The nerve!!

Anyway, I have to say that I met ONE nice driver once, and was so impressed with his gentlemanly behaviour that I have never forgotten it. In fact, I had decided to give Matatu Drivers the benefit of the doubt since then, but Daniels had to go and spoil it for them again! But about this other driver. I was on this Matatu headed out of town, in my usual spot by the driver, and was totally surprised by the courtesy with which he treated me. The main reason I was so impressed by this other driver was that even though he had every opportunity to keep brushing his fingers against my thigh as he moved the gear shift, he was veeery careful not to. Other drivers get their thrills by spreading their fingers out and moving the shift in such a way that that can feel you up... I am always totally baffled by that - I mean what can they possibly benefit from that?? These kinds of drivers will also usually slump in their seats and spread their legs so that their arm and thigh are in full contact with yours - this driver was different though - I could tell he was making a special effort to sit upright and keep himself to himself. I only ever see this kind of behaviour during the month of Ramathan - in that month these guys will even return your money in case you over pay them!! The first time it happened to me my eyes almost popped out of my skull!!

Anyway, this one driver not withstanding, I think of all the rest of them as annoying, thieving perverts; unless of course they give me cause (on a case-by-case- basis) to think otherwise.

Facebook took me over!

I used to come here very often to blog (read vent, reflect, etc.), but since I discovered Facebook I have a much quicker way to express myself - in that one sentence status report! Nevertheless, the last few days I have suddenly felt that I needed to take up blogging again.

It is impossible to compress one year of absence, so I will just take up with the most recent developments.

So. This morning I wake up from a dream. (Yes - as recently as this morning :-)) There is this guy that I think is totally hot and I think is kind of into me - 'kind of' being the operative phrase, seeing as he makes no effort to pursue me beyond sending me flirty messages on Facebook and texting me now and then. Anyway: had a really nice dream where he came to visit with me in my childhood home, and we took a walk hand in hand, which progressed to arms around waists, and finally to being engulfed by his arm around my shouder. As we were getting to the end of the walk he pulled me down to sit on the grass (I guess it was already dark since the grass had dew on it), and just as we were getting cozy, my stupid alarm woke me up! :-S

I have not had such a nice dream in ages and ages.. I attribute it to watching that movie 'wall e' last night - a robot love story that was so sweet!

That's all. Thought I would share. :-)